Not all letters of recommendation are created equal.

One of the most important elements of a graduate school application are supporting letters of recommendation (LORs).

These letters, typically from allied professionals in the field a student seeks to pursue, serve to both certify a candidate’s aptitude for the graduate program and endorse their candidacy broadly—as qualified, capable, and fit to thrive in a rigorous graduate program.

I am often surprised and dismayed, though, when...

1. relationships with prospective letter-writers are neglected,

2. when applicants are unsure of the quality of the letters they are receiving,

3. (related to #2) when applicants fail to assert some control of the content of their letters.

My goal in this post is to help aspiring graduate students plan for and obtain letters of recommendation that distinguish their candidacy, encouraging prospective programs to grant them admission. Remember, most programs require 2-4 letters!

I am crestfallen when I am helping someone prepare for graduate school and they sheepishly tell me that they’re not sure who to ask for their letters because they didn’t forge strong relationships with the right professionals on their journey to date. Do not get into this position! Think about letters early and often, and pursue relationships (combining both authenticity and strategy) that will yield strong letters.

Remember, not all letters are created equal!

Good letters emerge from strong relationships between the writer and the person requesting them. Knowing that you need letters from people in allied disciplines, consider the following strategies...

• Take multiple classes with the same person.

• Participate enthusiastically and meaningfully in class.

• Attend office hours to forge a more personal relationship with the writer.

• Earn a high grade.

• Offer to participate in or support the professor’s research.

Next, how you ask for a letter matters enormously. You have power in shaping the content of the letters that are written on your behalf. Think about the difference in possible outcomes between the following requests to a prospective letter writer:

“Could you please write me a letter for my application to…”

versus…

“As you know, I am pursuing graduate school in X, and I am writing to ask you would support my candidacy with a letter or recommendation. I greatly enjoyed your class, specifically X and Y, which was formative in my intellectual and personal development. The reasons I think you’d be a strong letter-writer are… You gave me positive, encouraging feedback on Y and Z, which I think the admissions committee would appreciate hearing about.”

The latter of those two requests takes the reins—by stating the reasons the writer would do the job well, the requester both flatters the writer (encouraging a ‘yes’ response) and provides a list of possible content to include in the letter (which is what the writer will include—writing letters is burdensome and time-consuming, so the more support you can provide, the better). By mentioning specific examples of strong performance, it is likely that the letter will take this shape, too. Remember, specificity and examples set great letters apart from "fine" letters, especially if your writer has a lot of students or supervisees. In this case, they simply may not have the headspace to remember all the details about you to furnish a strong letter—help them out!

The text above assumes you’re requesting a letter from academic letter writers, which is most common, but the principles apply broadly—to job or volunteer performance and the relationships you forge therein, for instance.

When requesting letters, be thoughtful and strategic, and don’t tarry in forging relationships that will yield this critical aspect of a comprehensive graduate school application package.